VIENNA, Austria – He’s now got a human name — Matthew Hiasl Pan — but he’s having trouble getting his day in court. Animal rights activists campaigning to get Pan, a 26-year-old chimpanzee, legally declared a person vowed Thursday to take their challenge to Austria’s Supreme Court after a lower court threw out their latest appeal.A provincial judge in the city of Wiener Neustadt dismissed the case earlier this week, ruling that the Vienna-based Association Against Animal Factories had no legal standing to argue on the chimp’s behalf.

The association, which worries the shelter caring for the chimp might close, has been pressing to get Pan declared a “person” so a guardian can be appointed to look out for his interests and provide him with a home.

Group president Martin Balluch insists that Pan is “a being with interests” and accuses the Austrian judicial system of monkeying around.

“It is astounding how all the courts try to evade the question of personhood of a chimp as much as they can,” Balluch said.

A hearing date for the Supreme Court appeal was not immediately set.

The legal tussle began in February, when the animal shelter where Pan and another chimp, Rosi, have lived for 25 years filed for bankruptcy protection.

Activists want to ensure the apes don’t wind up homeless if the shelter closes. Both were captured as babies in Sierra Leone in 1982 and smuggled in a crate to Austria for use in pharmaceutical experiments. Customs officers intercepted the shipment and turned the chimps over to the shelter.

Their upkeep costs about euro4,800 (US$6,800) a month. Donors have offered to help, but there’s a catch: Under Austrian law, only a person can receive personal gifts.

Organizers could set up a foundation to collect cash for Pan, whose life expectancy in captivity is about 60 years. But they contend that only personhood will give him the basic rights he needs to ensure he isn’t sold to someone outside Austria, where he’s now protected by strict animal cruelty laws.

In April, a district court judge rejected a British woman’s petition to be declared Pan’s legal guardian. That court ruled that the chimp was neither mentally impaired nor in danger, the grounds required for an individual to be appointed a guardian.

In dismissing the Association Against Animal Factories’ appeal this week, the provincial court said only a guardian could appeal. That doesn’t apply in this case, the group contends, since Pan hasn’t gained a guardian.

There is legal precedence in Austria for close friends to represent people who have no immediate family, “so he should be represented by his closest friends, as is the case,” said Eberhart Theuer, the group’s legal adviser.

“On these grounds we have appealed this decision to the Supreme Court in Vienna,” he said.

Until this summer, the chimp was known simply as Hiasl. However, in the latest court documents, he was identified with a little more dignity — if not humanity — as Matthew Hiasl Pan, with the last name derived from “chimpanzee.”

The Association Against Animal Factories points out that it’s not trying to get Pan declared a human, but rather a person, which would give him some kind of legal status.

Otherwise, he is legally a thing. And with the genetic makeup of chimpanzees and humans so strikingly similar, it contends, that just can’t be.

“The question is: Are chimps things without interests, or persons with interests?” Balluch said.

“A large section of the public does see chimps as beings with interests,” he said. “We are looking forward to hear what the high court has to say on this fundamental question.”

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The state’s top Alcoholic Beverage Control official resigned Tuesday after his arrest on drunken-driving charges. Read the rest of this entry »

A western Kentucky man spent the night in jail for wearing an inappropriate T-shirt to court. Read the rest of this entry »

A legislator who filed a lawsuit against God has gotten something he might not have expected: a response. One of two court filings from “God” came Wednesday under otherworldly circumstances, according to John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha. Click here for the full article.

A man who paid $20,000 in child support for a baby that did not exist has been awarded more than $1 million in damages by an Albuquerque jury against the DNA testing company that gave him the phony results. Read the rest of this entry »

Attractive nuisance

“[O]ne who artificially creates upon his premises any dangerous thing which from its nature has a tendency to attract the childish instincts of children to play with it is bound, as a mere matter of social duty, to take such reasonable precautions as the circumstances admit of, to the end that they may be protected from injury while so playing with it, or Franks v. S. Cotton Oil Co., 78 S.C. 10, 15, 58 S.E.2d 960, 961 (1907) (citing Seymour D. Thompson, 1 Commentaries on the Law of Negligence in all Relations § 1024 (2d ed. 1901) [hereinafter Thompson on Negligence]).coming in its vicinity.”

Ungaurded Dangerous Condition
Quite unlike its counterpart, unguarded dangerous condition disregards the element of attraction; both to the property and to the danger. See Everett v. White, 245 S.C. 331, 335, 140 S.E.2d 582, 584 (1965) (providing that although an artificial condition may not have special attraction for children, when the condition is left so exposed that children are likely to come into contact with it, and where their coming into contact with it is dangerous to them, the person exposing the dangerous thing should anticipate the injury that is likely to happen and is bound to take reasonable pains to prevent it); see also Franks, 78 S.C. at 15, 58 S.E.2d at 961.

A customer can sue a store for including her credit card expiration date on her receipt in violation of the Fair and Accurate Credit Transactions Act, even though she suffered no actual harm and the store argued it didn’t act willfully, a U.S. District Court in Pennsylvania has ruled.

Click here to read the full text of the opinion.

The Kentucky Law Review recently posted this rather peculiar story “regarding a criminal prosecution for practicing law without a license” of a man impersonating a lawyer.

Legal Writing Exercises

September 14, 2007

Finally, in plain langauge, Bryan A. Garner, presents Legal Writing in Plain English, “organized under fifty principles.”

How to file a lawsuit

September 12, 2007

Is court really a hobby? If so, everyone should download the Washington Coalition of Sexual Assault Programs: A Survivor’s Guide to Filing a Civil Lawsuit (2004), courtesy of shlep.